Our ladies in office

Ingabire Immaculée has always been a close representation of the woman I thought I wanted to be. 

I heard people calling her all sorts of names like Igishegabo, umugabo, umushiziw’isoni, umunyamahane, and she didn’t seem to give a s***! She was consistent,  especially when it came to matters of speaking for the people, and exposing government misfortunes. 

All the names that were given to her seemed to actually show how powerful and unsettling she was. The kind of woman who didn’t accept the status quo. But, is she the woman I thought she was? I am not about to attack the person of Ingabire Immaculée. I know better, and I was raised better (I hope) to know that it makes more sense to analyze people’s point of view and arguments, than attacking the “Who they are”. 

Huummm!

Recently, a young lady called Isimbi willingly posted nudes on her Instagram page. I cannot tell you that I was not shocked by the boldness and the craziness of the whole idea. When I saw the photos, I admit I took time trying to figure out what she was thinking. Did she think of the consequences, is she mentally prepared for the ocean of horrible things coming her way, did she do it to prove a point, did she do it as a form of art, was it a desperate move or was it perhaps an absolutely clear statement that she was free and didn’t care or is her confidence way stronger than all of ours combined? While I was asking myself all that, I also noted that the phots were actually well thought of (I am not sure if this is an important detail anyway). 

Isimbi absolutely broke the internet. I loved entertaining the idea in my head, of government officials sending each other the screenshots of her photos (since most of them are not on IG) examining all the angles, asking for more. Some leaving it at that, others being agitated, and others fulfilling the self-proclaimed role of Umuco brigade_officers. 

Now, are you going to ask me if I am ok (morally) with what Isimbi did? I will not answer that, because it is not my place to feel ok or not. I am a product of this society too, and I definitely wouldn’t like my daughter to push it that far, that’s a fact. But that being said, I respect her choice and secretly admire her courage. I wonder if her heart was beating so fast when she was almost pressing the ‘Share’ button, or if she was so relaxed and laughing about it? I will never know, because, those questions are not important now. 

A few days after the photos _I wonder what took them long_came the comments of the Rwanda minister of Sport and Culture, Nyirasafari Espérance  and Ingabire Immaculée , the boss of Transparency Rwanda. I am mentioning their titles so that we understand the impact that their positions and words have on the society. These, are few of the very powerful women that Rwanda has. Just for laughs, sadly, I saw a tweet on my TL_ right before this ‘incident’_ a gentleman had posted a group photo of the so many women in our Government and Parliament with President Kagame. He said that if you wanted to know how a world run by women looks like, you could take Rwanda as an example. I told him it was a big fat lie, and I can prove it. 

Screen grab of the actual article on Igihe.com

The minister of SPORTS AND CULTURE suggested that the police and RIB (Rwanda Investigation Bureau) look into Isimbi’s case. Now fam, should we drop a list of the so many things that don’t seem to work in that ministry and really deserve an investigation? Should we talk about her previous role and how many investigation tips a “gender and family promotion’’ minister should have given to the police and RIB? The first time we heard about Isimbi, she wanted to become Miss Rwanda for some reason! She told her story, she said she didn’t have a family, she didn’t have any sort of formal education, she actually had no one to raise her when she was a kid, she stayed on the road, in prisons, she knows a thing or two about human trafficking. How wonderful would it have been to hear about the minister then! 

Today, from the comfort of her seat, she is just going to ignore who this young lady is, her story, her life, her frustrations, her whole being, her FREEDOM and just call a police investigation on her? The Whole RIB? Really? What a privilege! Sometimes, I wonder why our officials do not comment about the most important things for the country, but are very comfortable throwing in their ideas on trivial matters. 

Cerise sur gâteaux, came the one and only Immaculée.  She said Isimbi was mental for taking such photos. Her point of view anyway, if Isimbi is not happy, let her go to court for defamation (Let me not ill advise her, she might not win the case). The most shocking thing though is seeing a woman of her stature, exposure, experience and age uttering words that surely only people with serious lack of thinking ability would say. Maze babafata ku ngufu bakavuza induru (And they are all vocal when they get raped). How dare you?! How many ladies do you know were raped because they decided to take nudes? You are a Rwandan woman for heaven sakes. You are not going to pretend that you do not know about the rape culture in our society. How in your right mind do you still believe that the height of the skirt is a factor that contributes to rape? Really? 

She said it herself.  'If you expose your body out there, don't be shocked if people trespass and even rape you'. (Impossible to properly translate the "Kwanika imibiri ku gasozi)

I understand you were raised in this system. My mother too. But never once will she accept the ignorant excuse that someone got raped because she was naked. (Unless she shocks me with a different opinion). Women, at least some of us, know that our bodies are ours only, and the appearance of it is not an invitation, or any form of consent. Do you even know what consent means? If at your age, with knowledge and important position you hold, still believe that a woman does not own herself, body and decision, then how do you even start fighting that ‘Ruswa ishingiye ku gitsina’ you always talk about? Do you advise girls how to dress so that they do not attract people who might ask for the bedroom tour before work? The truth is that out there, many think like you, in fact, your message helped them express their feelings, and it is scary to say the least. 

'One can rape if provoked'. He says.

For us all to cohabit in the society, there must be some sort of rules and regulations. I guess we all agree that this is important. More often than not, the rules are unfair, unfavorable and unforgiving to women. It is so sad that women who should be advocating for us all decide to be unfortunate and trash the trust. I really deep inside hoped that the statements made by these women were somehow distorted, but Nooo, Immaculée confirmed hers with a tweet. If we really had been in a country that is run by women, this kind of talk  would have caused the biggest uproar ever. The rape culture gets stronger because of rape apologists statements like this one. How many of our ladies in office took a clear position against it? How many released any official communication about this? How many called this out? If anything, the first one to talk about this craziness was a young ‘male’ minister, followed by a not so very young ‘male’ minister. So where are our ladies in office? 

We are more than glad that our ladies do have decision making positions, we are delighted that some of them are doing well, we are happy to be the country that has more female MPs (since 2004), but positions come with both professional and moral responsibilities to make the society better (for all of us). The next time someone says that Rwanda is run by women…we will have a long long discussion. 

With this blog please understand that I am not encouraging young women or men (we have seen some lately) to go naked. I am not advising anyone anything, I am nobody’s aunty and I am certainly no expert. I will say two things though. First, I appreciate the understanding of some of our brothers on this matter. It is amazing. They will raise their children well, and hopefully the world will be safer for my children. 

Second, between Isimbi and team Esperence-Immaculée, guess who scares me the most? I can tell you for free that it is not Isimbi.